It's been 1 year since Jack, a dear friend of mine and my family's, passed away. It's amazing how fast time flies and yet at the same time feels like it doesn't move at all. Just these past 2 weeks, the church family buried 2 other dear friends. When I think of the many friends and kind loving people that I've had to say goodbye to in my lifetime, it can really get me down. BUT, I know that there will come a day when I will be able to see them again and I eagerly await that time.
Lord, use me here to be a witness to others of Your grace and forgiveness. Give me the patience and strength to get through the difficult and sad days when I think of others who have gone on before me. And please give me the wisdom and right words to say so that I may be able to lead others to You and Your saving grace. So that one day, we may all rejoice in Heaven together. Amen.
In honor and memory of Jack, I'm going to listen to Hawaiian music today.
"Because you'll never find, another, Hawaiian like me..." :)
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Living Testament
Saw this on Patsy Clairmont's Facebook page. It's one of my favorite songs performed by Fernando Ortega and so appropriate to be played as a tribute to Ruth Bell Graham. Beautiful.
Wow Lord. What a testament.
The deep desire of my heart is to be a living example of Your love, forgiveness, and grace. Also to be a best friend, lover, a Christian wife and partner to my husband.
When I watched this video, and saw how Billy looked at his wife, and heard people's testimony about her life and walk with You... Wow! I want some of that! How amazing and beautiful. It showed me even more how important it is to put You first and trust in You to take care of my needs so that I can service others.
But so many times I feel like I fall short. It is so easy to let the things of this world seep into my life, my actions, and our home. Please don't let me get bogged down in that again. Protect my heart and my husband's and this home.
Thank you for being a loving God and Father. Please continue to guide me and show me areas that I need to change.
And...
Although I will probably never be as well known as Ruth Bell Graham was, I hope that when You call me home to Heaven, that somehow, somewhere, my life will have been a living testament to someone who needed to hear about Your love, grace, mercy, and forgiveness. I want my life to reflect, to others, the love and respect I have for You first, my husband second, and my family third.
Just give me Jesus. :)
Thank you, Lord.
Your child,
Bethany
Wow Lord. What a testament.
The deep desire of my heart is to be a living example of Your love, forgiveness, and grace. Also to be a best friend, lover, a Christian wife and partner to my husband.
When I watched this video, and saw how Billy looked at his wife, and heard people's testimony about her life and walk with You... Wow! I want some of that! How amazing and beautiful. It showed me even more how important it is to put You first and trust in You to take care of my needs so that I can service others.
But so many times I feel like I fall short. It is so easy to let the things of this world seep into my life, my actions, and our home. Please don't let me get bogged down in that again. Protect my heart and my husband's and this home.
Thank you for being a loving God and Father. Please continue to guide me and show me areas that I need to change.
And...
Although I will probably never be as well known as Ruth Bell Graham was, I hope that when You call me home to Heaven, that somehow, somewhere, my life will have been a living testament to someone who needed to hear about Your love, grace, mercy, and forgiveness. I want my life to reflect, to others, the love and respect I have for You first, my husband second, and my family third.
Just give me Jesus. :)
Thank you, Lord.
Your child,
Bethany
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
SAVE OHIO LIBRARIES!
Dear Governor Strickland,
I would like to share how saddened and disappointed I am by hearing of the drastic budget cuts you are planning for the Ohio public library system. Public libraries are the back bone of a community.
With the way the economy has been, public libraries are a necessity in that they provide the unemployed (or soon to be unemployed) the ability to job hunt, prepare their resumes and vitaes, and ready themselves for job interviews all through their FREE OF CHARGE internet and book loan services. People who are having a tough time financially can still help meet their children’s needs by: enrolling them in many of the free children's programs libraries offer, bringing home books (free of charge) and read to their children, bringing their children in to use the internet and many of the educational websites on there (like PBS.org). The public library system also provides children and teens with a safe and engaging environment for them to go to and learn while keeping them off the streets.
Also by cutting library funding, you will be hurting the public school system. We all know that the educational budget is tight and financially strapped. Public schools (and home schoolers) rely on the public libraries in their community to assist students in their research needs where the school cannot. If the public library is forced to close because the funding isn’t there, then Ohio’s educational system will suffer. Students research needs won’t be meant. Ohio’s graduating students would be at a higher disadvantage educationally in the job field and when enrolling in other colleges and universities than other students graduating from another state where public libraries are not in such dire financial crisis. Cut library funding and I can GUARANTEE you: many libraries will be forced to close, school assessment/proficiency scores will be down significantly state-wide, unemployment rates will be even higher, crime rates will also raise because, in many communities, students will no longer have a safe place to go to that keeps them off the streets.
Please rethink this proposal. When I was a child and growing up, my parents knew how important the public library was in supplementing our learning (especially during the summer months) and growing. It is because of their enrolling me in the public library’s programs and frequent library visits as a young child, that I am in the position I am today at the Kent State University Ashtabula Campus Library. Cut the budget as bad as you are proposing and not only will affect the libraries and staff, but you will also affect the communities around the state and our future, the children.
Sincerely,
Bethany
I would like to share how saddened and disappointed I am by hearing of the drastic budget cuts you are planning for the Ohio public library system. Public libraries are the back bone of a community.
With the way the economy has been, public libraries are a necessity in that they provide the unemployed (or soon to be unemployed) the ability to job hunt, prepare their resumes and vitaes, and ready themselves for job interviews all through their FREE OF CHARGE internet and book loan services. People who are having a tough time financially can still help meet their children’s needs by: enrolling them in many of the free children's programs libraries offer, bringing home books (free of charge) and read to their children, bringing their children in to use the internet and many of the educational websites on there (like PBS.org). The public library system also provides children and teens with a safe and engaging environment for them to go to and learn while keeping them off the streets.
Also by cutting library funding, you will be hurting the public school system. We all know that the educational budget is tight and financially strapped. Public schools (and home schoolers) rely on the public libraries in their community to assist students in their research needs where the school cannot. If the public library is forced to close because the funding isn’t there, then Ohio’s educational system will suffer. Students research needs won’t be meant. Ohio’s graduating students would be at a higher disadvantage educationally in the job field and when enrolling in other colleges and universities than other students graduating from another state where public libraries are not in such dire financial crisis. Cut library funding and I can GUARANTEE you: many libraries will be forced to close, school assessment/proficiency scores will be down significantly state-wide, unemployment rates will be even higher, crime rates will also raise because, in many communities, students will no longer have a safe place to go to that keeps them off the streets.
Please rethink this proposal. When I was a child and growing up, my parents knew how important the public library was in supplementing our learning (especially during the summer months) and growing. It is because of their enrolling me in the public library’s programs and frequent library visits as a young child, that I am in the position I am today at the Kent State University Ashtabula Campus Library. Cut the budget as bad as you are proposing and not only will affect the libraries and staff, but you will also affect the communities around the state and our future, the children.
Sincerely,
Bethany
Friday, April 17, 2009
Many the Miles
Okay so I'm a huge fan of Sara Bareilles and her music. One of my favorite songs of hers is a song called Many the Miles and I always wanted to know why and what inspired her to write this song. Today I read her myspace blog and found out what her inspiration was and I thought I should share it with you all.
Sara writes:
So I wrote this song as a reminder to myself to keep going in search of love and truth and light and it remains to be and ideal I love to stay connected to.
I suck at it a lot of the time actually, to be honest. I get bitchy, and bored, and irritable, and uninspired and I spend a lot of energy on what i don't like about myself. But at the end of a good day I can take solace in the fact that I am someone who truly wants to be peaceful. Who knows I have the capacity to be truly happy. Not every moment of everyday... but sometimes, and if I'm really committed... a lot of the time.
I don't want to settle for less.
And i wish that for every single one of you. That when you look at your life you gravitate towards what feeds your soul and the people that make you feel inspired and content and beautiful (on the inside, silly). That you give yourself permission to be flawed and imperfect and "lesser than". Know that we all are. I promise. We just don't like to admit it.
So that's my rant for today.
As I cross the miles to get to our destination, I want to send you all little boxes of light that make you feel courageous and perfect. Just in being who you are.
So there.
xoxo
sara
Thank you Sara for that reminder. :) I really needed to read that after this week. :) You can check out the full post and her other blog posts on her myspace blog page at http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=15637801&blogID=483526660
Sara writes:
So I wrote this song as a reminder to myself to keep going in search of love and truth and light and it remains to be and ideal I love to stay connected to.
I suck at it a lot of the time actually, to be honest. I get bitchy, and bored, and irritable, and uninspired and I spend a lot of energy on what i don't like about myself. But at the end of a good day I can take solace in the fact that I am someone who truly wants to be peaceful. Who knows I have the capacity to be truly happy. Not every moment of everyday... but sometimes, and if I'm really committed... a lot of the time.
I don't want to settle for less.
And i wish that for every single one of you. That when you look at your life you gravitate towards what feeds your soul and the people that make you feel inspired and content and beautiful (on the inside, silly). That you give yourself permission to be flawed and imperfect and "lesser than". Know that we all are. I promise. We just don't like to admit it.
So that's my rant for today.
As I cross the miles to get to our destination, I want to send you all little boxes of light that make you feel courageous and perfect. Just in being who you are.
So there.
xoxo
sara
Thank you Sara for that reminder. :) I really needed to read that after this week. :) You can check out the full post and her other blog posts on her myspace blog page at http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=15637801&blogID=483526660
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
I dreamed a dream
This just goes to show that you can't judge a book by its cover or a person by how they look. Watch the whole video and prepare to get goosebumps (the good kind). Good job Susan Boyle!!!!
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Happy Sunny Day
So today has been sunny and warmer than the previous week. All in all a pretty good day. :) I've also been sleeping better since the hubby and I have rearranged some things upstairs. The bedroom looks more open and inviting instead of cluttered and chaotic.
Work wasn't too bad today and it's ending on a really good note. :) So I'm smiling right now and totally enjoying it. :D How's your day been?
(This was the only Morning Song by Priscilla Ahn I could find on YouTube!)
morning
sunrise
open my eyes
and i can tell it's gonna be a good day
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
did you sleep well?
did you dream at all?
can you tell me the time?
on the alarm clock
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
but you can sleep in
you just keep dreamin
for us
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
Work wasn't too bad today and it's ending on a really good note. :) So I'm smiling right now and totally enjoying it. :D How's your day been?
(This was the only Morning Song by Priscilla Ahn I could find on YouTube!)
morning
sunrise
open my eyes
and i can tell it's gonna be a good day
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
did you sleep well?
did you dream at all?
can you tell me the time?
on the alarm clock
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
but you can sleep in
you just keep dreamin
for us
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
i can tell it's gonna be a good day
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Armani and Crabs
So this morning has been a fun morning, all because of my twitter and facebook status. It says: Yesterday I was intoxicated by Armani & now I've given Tom crabs. Since Tom has crabs, now Jen has crabs too. What is this world coming to?
:D It sounds dirty but it is a true statement. :)
Although the crabs I'm talking about are horseshoe crab shells I found on the beach while in Florida that I gave to my friends b/c Tom had asked for one. I really was almost intoxicated by Armani (cologne) yesterday. But I didn't mind b/c it's good smelling stuff. :)
Now that you know the story it doesn't seem so dirty. BUT...
If I randomly went up to you and told you that I had been intoxicated by Armani and given 2 of my friends crabs you probably would've looked at me funny and run the other way. :)
So I guess you could say to me that today I'm toxic? Well... maybe not. :) But the song has popped into my head (I think it's mostly b/c of this mornings "events") and so I'm going to post it on here. :) Unfortunately, I can't find an embeddable version of the official music video on YouTube so I'm leaving you with a one that just has the lyrics. :(
Hope your day is as sun shiny and crab free as mine! :)
:D It sounds dirty but it is a true statement. :)
Although the crabs I'm talking about are horseshoe crab shells I found on the beach while in Florida that I gave to my friends b/c Tom had asked for one. I really was almost intoxicated by Armani (cologne) yesterday. But I didn't mind b/c it's good smelling stuff. :)
Now that you know the story it doesn't seem so dirty. BUT...
If I randomly went up to you and told you that I had been intoxicated by Armani and given 2 of my friends crabs you probably would've looked at me funny and run the other way. :)
So I guess you could say to me that today I'm toxic? Well... maybe not. :) But the song has popped into my head (I think it's mostly b/c of this mornings "events") and so I'm going to post it on here. :) Unfortunately, I can't find an embeddable version of the official music video on YouTube so I'm leaving you with a one that just has the lyrics. :(
Hope your day is as sun shiny and crab free as mine! :)
Thursday, April 2, 2009
A prayer for peace, strenghth and wisdom borrowed from King David
I'm trying not to be frustrated but I am. Where do you want me Lord? Why do you put these desires/wishes in my heart? What am I supposed to do? When will they be fulfilled? I feel like I'm constantly fighting for my sanity. I want peace. Please protect me, show me, hold me up.
Psalm 143:3-12
3 The enemy pursues me,
he crushes me to the ground;
he makes me dwell in darkness
like those long dead.
4 So my spirit grows faint within me;
my heart within me is dismayed.
5 I remember the days of long ago;
I meditate on all your works
and consider what your hands have done.
6 I spread out my hands to you;
my soul thirsts for you like a parched land.
Selah
7 Answer me quickly, O LORD;
my spirit fails.
Do not hide your face from me
or I will be like those who go down to the pit.
8 Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
9 Rescue me from my enemies, O LORD,
for I hide myself in you.
10 Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good Spirit
lead me on level ground.
11 For your name's sake, O LORD, preserve my life;
in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble.
12 In your unfailing love, silence my enemies;
destroy all my foes,
for I am your servant.
FALLING
by Kate Rusby
Ya hear me shout when no one's about,
You find me where I can't be seen.
I feel the air flowing for life's in full swing,
So tell me why I cannot breathe.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
Time moves on and time won't be long,
In time I will fear not the day.
I'm endlessly knowing that you'll never know
What I might want you to say.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
My back it aches, my body it breaks;
To grow my own wings I have tried.
And painless I came no aim must remain,
Alone and adrift on the tide
But here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
And here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone
Psalm 143:3-12
3 The enemy pursues me,
he crushes me to the ground;
he makes me dwell in darkness
like those long dead.
4 So my spirit grows faint within me;
my heart within me is dismayed.
5 I remember the days of long ago;
I meditate on all your works
and consider what your hands have done.
6 I spread out my hands to you;
my soul thirsts for you like a parched land.
Selah
7 Answer me quickly, O LORD;
my spirit fails.
Do not hide your face from me
or I will be like those who go down to the pit.
8 Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
9 Rescue me from my enemies, O LORD,
for I hide myself in you.
10 Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good Spirit
lead me on level ground.
11 For your name's sake, O LORD, preserve my life;
in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble.
12 In your unfailing love, silence my enemies;
destroy all my foes,
for I am your servant.
FALLING
by Kate Rusby
Ya hear me shout when no one's about,
You find me where I can't be seen.
I feel the air flowing for life's in full swing,
So tell me why I cannot breathe.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
Time moves on and time won't be long,
In time I will fear not the day.
I'm endlessly knowing that you'll never know
What I might want you to say.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
My back it aches, my body it breaks;
To grow my own wings I have tried.
And painless I came no aim must remain,
Alone and adrift on the tide
But here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
And here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Trading my sorrows
So I've been going through some things in my life recently that have been a challenge for me. My attempts at remaining positive through all of this has resulted in mostly fails. (I swear I'm not emo. I promise. Even though these blogs would lead you to think I was, I'm not.) So I'm trying to maintain a more positive attitude when life isn't going my way (which this year seems to be about 90% of the time).
Right now I'm at that point. I can either fret and worry and get upset, OR... I can put a smile on my face and try to think of positive things and things to be grateful for. So while I was pondering whether or not I pout or praise, the song Trading My Sorrows by Darrell Evans popped into my head. Very appropriate. :) So I've decided to "trade in my sorrows" and push through. The end of today is almost here.
Incidentally, the Snapple "Real Fact" #168 from my Snapple tea I'm drinking today says: "One brow wrinkle is the result of 200,000 frowns."
Can you believe that?! Well I guess that's just another reason to decide to remain positive. I'd much rather have wrinkles from smiling and laughing too much than from frowning! :)
Right now I'm at that point. I can either fret and worry and get upset, OR... I can put a smile on my face and try to think of positive things and things to be grateful for. So while I was pondering whether or not I pout or praise, the song Trading My Sorrows by Darrell Evans popped into my head. Very appropriate. :) So I've decided to "trade in my sorrows" and push through. The end of today is almost here.
Incidentally, the Snapple "Real Fact" #168 from my Snapple tea I'm drinking today says: "One brow wrinkle is the result of 200,000 frowns."
Can you believe that?! Well I guess that's just another reason to decide to remain positive. I'd much rather have wrinkles from smiling and laughing too much than from frowning! :)
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Spring
As I've gotten older and experienced more winters in this dark/no-sun corner of the state, I've seen a pattern in my life and how I spend my time. When winter starts to set in and it gets darker sooner, I find that I have a harder time motivating myself to do indoor projects like cleaning, reorganizing, etc. All I want to do when I get home is read, veg-out, chat on the computer, and the list goes on. I HATE it because I feel like the world's laziest person ever but I can't seem to motivate myself enough to get up and do something about it. Then on Saturday or Sunday, I'm rushing around trying to clean the whole house. The older I've gotten, the worse it's become. And this winter has not been an exception. :(
But now "spring" is here, even though it is only 30-40 degrees. The sun is out longer, because of the time change, and when I get home late from work I'm not so tired (mainly b/c it is still sunny when I get home).
There seems to be a family predisposition to light sensitivity on my dad's side of the family. Basically what that means is that lack of sun and exposure to sun can lead to one being depressed or sluggish. I love the winter b/c with it brings birthdays, Christmas, New Years, and Nerdfest. But once February 1 hits, I'm ready for it to be over. I hate the dark and I feel sluggish and not myself.
Being in Florida last week was a welcome break. It was sunny and 82 degrees the whole time we were there. It was wonderful! It felt like summer and all the radio stations were playing "summer-ish" songs (upbeat songs that you can dance to and get you out of bed in the morning like Kanye West, Beyonce, Britney Spears) all the time.
Then we get back here and it's just pah... :(
But Florida helped me bounce back so I'm going to try to take some of this energy I've collected and use it to overhaul the upstairs. I know I've said that many times but I'm really going to do it today and no one can stop me. :)
I'm going to leave you with one of those Florida overplayed "summer songs". I'm sure by the end of this year the song will drive me nuts b/c all the dj's in this area will have overplayed it. But for now, I LOVE it. :)
But now "spring" is here, even though it is only 30-40 degrees. The sun is out longer, because of the time change, and when I get home late from work I'm not so tired (mainly b/c it is still sunny when I get home).
There seems to be a family predisposition to light sensitivity on my dad's side of the family. Basically what that means is that lack of sun and exposure to sun can lead to one being depressed or sluggish. I love the winter b/c with it brings birthdays, Christmas, New Years, and Nerdfest. But once February 1 hits, I'm ready for it to be over. I hate the dark and I feel sluggish and not myself.
Being in Florida last week was a welcome break. It was sunny and 82 degrees the whole time we were there. It was wonderful! It felt like summer and all the radio stations were playing "summer-ish" songs (upbeat songs that you can dance to and get you out of bed in the morning like Kanye West, Beyonce, Britney Spears) all the time.
Then we get back here and it's just pah... :(
But Florida helped me bounce back so I'm going to try to take some of this energy I've collected and use it to overhaul the upstairs. I know I've said that many times but I'm really going to do it today and no one can stop me. :)
I'm going to leave you with one of those Florida overplayed "summer songs". I'm sure by the end of this year the song will drive me nuts b/c all the dj's in this area will have overplayed it. But for now, I LOVE it. :)
Sunday, March 8, 2009
If you like pina coladas...
Day 3 in Florida, day 2 at the beach house in the keys. BEAUTIFUL!!! ;) Tomorrow will probably be shopping of some sort. Tuesday will dolphins and turtles (probably). We're going to Key West on Wed and after that I'm not so sure but totally loving this place. :) Creepy thing is.... Portuguese man of war wash up frequently on our beach. Scary uber bad jelly fish but they're easy to get rid of. There's coconut palms all over our property! :D So today we had fresh coconut. The 2 men in the household have become experts at getting the hard outermost shell of the coconut off. :)
All in all, great day at "home". :)
All in all, great day at "home". :)
Friday, March 6, 2009
FLORIDA DAY 1 part 2: Let's go fly a kite
So the second part of the day was spent at the St Augustine beach. Our friends that we came with took their kids out to the shore line to play and collect shells, I walked the beach, and Chris just relaxed on the beach and watched everyone. It had been a very long day and we were all extremely tired. When I got back, another family a ways down from Chris had set up some large kites and had them flying. Watching kites and relaxing on the beach. A perfect way to end the day. :)
My husband and a kite. He is not flying them, a family next to us set up and flew the kites.
I will try to keep this updated as the vacation goes on. :) Hope you all are having a good weekend!
 |
| From Blogger Pictures |
My husband and a kite. He is not flying them, a family next to us set up and flew the kites.
 |
| From Blogger Pictures |
I will try to keep this updated as the vacation goes on. :) Hope you all are having a good weekend!
FLORIDA DAY 1: Sittin on the dock of the bay
Well we've made it. We're in Florida! :D Tomorrow we leave for the Florida Keys and spend the rest of the weekend and next week there. :)
We drove all night Thursday night and spent the rest of Friday in St. Augustine (the old/touristy town and the beach). The weather was BEAUTIFUL and although we're completely exhausted we've had a lot of fun.
This post is for my 2 work buddies b/c I left my last day of work before the vacation cheekly singing "Sittin on the dock of the bay...". So T and J this is for you. :) I did sit, on a cement walkway, near a bay? Okay... so it was the Atlantic ocean, but hey it doesn't really matter. :) I sat and wasted time. :)The picture below shows just this ;)
And here is a recording of this song for your viewing and listening pleasure. :)
We drove all night Thursday night and spent the rest of Friday in St. Augustine (the old/touristy town and the beach). The weather was BEAUTIFUL and although we're completely exhausted we've had a lot of fun.
This post is for my 2 work buddies b/c I left my last day of work before the vacation cheekly singing "Sittin on the dock of the bay...". So T and J this is for you. :) I did sit, on a cement walkway, near a bay? Okay... so it was the Atlantic ocean, but hey it doesn't really matter. :) I sat and wasted time. :)The picture below shows just this ;)
 |
| From Blogger Pictures |
And here is a recording of this song for your viewing and listening pleasure. :)
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
And the countdown begins
Going to warmth soon and I can't wait!!!! :D Here's a fun, peppy, little song for all you "listeners" out there. :)
I love this song. :) It reminds me of the movie 50 First Dates. (If you haven't watched it, you MUST rent it right away and watch it!) It also reminds me of warm, sunny, summer days. :) So as I close out my work day and the time for my vaca in warmth draws near... I will leave you all with this. :)
I love this song. :) It reminds me of the movie 50 First Dates. (If you haven't watched it, you MUST rent it right away and watch it!) It also reminds me of warm, sunny, summer days. :) So as I close out my work day and the time for my vaca in warmth draws near... I will leave you all with this. :)
Friday, February 27, 2009
Life lesson via radio
So the past couple of weeks, months, etc have been interesting. Pretty much a total roller coaster ride starting in 2009. These past couple of weeks the roller coaster has pretty much been going down hill. And I haven't handled all of it in the best way.
I've tried and failed. Many times I just cried out in grief and frustration to God asking "Why me?". I've not been proud of the way I've handled these tough (for me) times. There are other people in the world going through so much worse than I am or ever have and their faith was strengthened by it. I've been a wimp, I'll admit it.
I just want for all this "bad stuff" to go away as fast as it can. I didn't want to wait any more for my prayers to be answered. I'm not proud of it but through most of the tough times, I've fought with God about my unresolved prayers instead of falling on my knees and praying to Him.
This morning I received an eye opener when I was listening to Scott and Kelly on Air1 (a Christian radio station) on my way into work. They played Barlow Girl's song "I believe in love". Although I've heard it before, listening to it this time really opened my eyes to the meaning of the song.
When I got into work I did a quick YouTube search for it and found a recorded video of them performing it at a concert. In the beginning of the video, they talk about their inspiration for this song and I got another eye opener.
We are like unrefined gold and God is the goldsmith. In order to make gold pure and valuable the unrefined material must be heated between 1,830°F and 2,010°F. The metals are separated through this and after a few more steps of fire and separation, the goldsmith has pure gold. When we go through trials and tribulations, things can get hot quick and life can be very uncomfortable. But we are in that fire because God is trying to refine us, to make us more pure. It is in our trials and tribulations where our character is formed where our relationship with the Lord becomes more pure. It is in these trials that we grow. Or at least it's supposed to be...
I've been through bad times before, many. In fact there is a whole year of my life where so many stressful and bad (at the time) things happened, that I don't even remember that year very well at all. And I think that for the most part, I did "good" I didn't struggle (much) and I was faithful in my devotions and walk with God.
But this time...
This time...
This time has been one of the toughest. I've been struggling with a desire/want that I hold very dear to my heart and I don't want to let it go. The more time passes and my prayers go unanswered, the deeper the hurt and pain. When I think of it, and all the time I've been struggling with it, it brings tears to my eyes. Lately, although I know I have many good friends out there praying for me, I've shed more tears over it than I have ever shed in my life.
I've been losing faith but I'm still struggling hard to hold on as best as I possibly can. I can't give up b/c that would cost me everything.
Lord will you please forgive me for holding on so tightly to the desires of my heart? I never thought that I would be tested about this for so long and I really don't know how much I can do. I know I can't and shouldn't fight you but it's become my defense mechanism. Please forgive me Lord for spending more time upset at you then running to you for comfort. You know the desire of my heart, You put it there. I pray Lord that you will answer this prayer. But I pray that it is done in your time. And if that means I have to wait another month, year, or 5 years please give me strength to be able to overcome it. I'm broken and I can't go on by myself anymore. I hurt too much to go at it alone.
Thank you so much for being a loving, caring and forgiving God. Please help me be a better Christian.
~Bethany
READERS: The video and lyrics are below. Please listen to the whole thing, if you can. The beginning of the video talks about their inspiration for the song and the lesson they learned from it. I also ask that you will please continue to keep me in your prayers. Thank you.
Barlow Girl - I Believe in Love
How long will my prayers seem unanswered?
Is there still faith in me to reach the end?
I'm feeling doubt I'm losing faith
But giving up would cost me everything
So I'll stand in the pain and the silence
And I'll speak to the dark night
I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God even when He is silent
And I, I believe
Though I can't see my stories ending
That doesn't mean the dark night has no end
It's only here that I find faith
And learn to trust the one who writes my days
So I'll stand in the pain and the silence
And I'll speak to the dark night
I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God even when He is silent
And I, yeah
No dark can consume Light
No death greater than this life
We are not forgotten
Hope is found when we say
Even when He is silent
I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God even when He is silent
And I, I believe, I believe
I've tried and failed. Many times I just cried out in grief and frustration to God asking "Why me?". I've not been proud of the way I've handled these tough (for me) times. There are other people in the world going through so much worse than I am or ever have and their faith was strengthened by it. I've been a wimp, I'll admit it.
I just want for all this "bad stuff" to go away as fast as it can. I didn't want to wait any more for my prayers to be answered. I'm not proud of it but through most of the tough times, I've fought with God about my unresolved prayers instead of falling on my knees and praying to Him.
This morning I received an eye opener when I was listening to Scott and Kelly on Air1 (a Christian radio station) on my way into work. They played Barlow Girl's song "I believe in love". Although I've heard it before, listening to it this time really opened my eyes to the meaning of the song.
When I got into work I did a quick YouTube search for it and found a recorded video of them performing it at a concert. In the beginning of the video, they talk about their inspiration for this song and I got another eye opener.
We are like unrefined gold and God is the goldsmith. In order to make gold pure and valuable the unrefined material must be heated between 1,830°F and 2,010°F. The metals are separated through this and after a few more steps of fire and separation, the goldsmith has pure gold. When we go through trials and tribulations, things can get hot quick and life can be very uncomfortable. But we are in that fire because God is trying to refine us, to make us more pure. It is in our trials and tribulations where our character is formed where our relationship with the Lord becomes more pure. It is in these trials that we grow. Or at least it's supposed to be...
I've been through bad times before, many. In fact there is a whole year of my life where so many stressful and bad (at the time) things happened, that I don't even remember that year very well at all. And I think that for the most part, I did "good" I didn't struggle (much) and I was faithful in my devotions and walk with God.
But this time...
This time...
This time has been one of the toughest. I've been struggling with a desire/want that I hold very dear to my heart and I don't want to let it go. The more time passes and my prayers go unanswered, the deeper the hurt and pain. When I think of it, and all the time I've been struggling with it, it brings tears to my eyes. Lately, although I know I have many good friends out there praying for me, I've shed more tears over it than I have ever shed in my life.
I've been losing faith but I'm still struggling hard to hold on as best as I possibly can. I can't give up b/c that would cost me everything.
Lord will you please forgive me for holding on so tightly to the desires of my heart? I never thought that I would be tested about this for so long and I really don't know how much I can do. I know I can't and shouldn't fight you but it's become my defense mechanism. Please forgive me Lord for spending more time upset at you then running to you for comfort. You know the desire of my heart, You put it there. I pray Lord that you will answer this prayer. But I pray that it is done in your time. And if that means I have to wait another month, year, or 5 years please give me strength to be able to overcome it. I'm broken and I can't go on by myself anymore. I hurt too much to go at it alone.
Thank you so much for being a loving, caring and forgiving God. Please help me be a better Christian.
~Bethany
READERS: The video and lyrics are below. Please listen to the whole thing, if you can. The beginning of the video talks about their inspiration for the song and the lesson they learned from it. I also ask that you will please continue to keep me in your prayers. Thank you.
Barlow Girl - I Believe in Love
How long will my prayers seem unanswered?
Is there still faith in me to reach the end?
I'm feeling doubt I'm losing faith
But giving up would cost me everything
So I'll stand in the pain and the silence
And I'll speak to the dark night
I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God even when He is silent
And I, I believe
Though I can't see my stories ending
That doesn't mean the dark night has no end
It's only here that I find faith
And learn to trust the one who writes my days
So I'll stand in the pain and the silence
And I'll speak to the dark night
I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God even when He is silent
And I, yeah
No dark can consume Light
No death greater than this life
We are not forgotten
Hope is found when we say
Even when He is silent
I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God even when He is silent
And I, I believe, I believe
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
SLOW ME DOWN!!!!
So this week has been crazy busy! (More so at work than at home...) Just a very weird, chaotic, pretty much stressful week. So I think this song is very applicable for this week b/c I've totally felt like her. It's called Slow Me Down, by Emmy Rossum. And...
Thank you to my friends and family who've been there with me through the psycho-ness of this week. I couldn't have attempted to be able to finish it (the week) without you and your warm thoughts and words. :) Thank you so much. I love you all. ;)
I'm SO glad this week is almost over...
SKIP TO THE 35 SEC MARK B/C THE BEGINNING IS JUST ADVERTISING JUNK AND NOT THE ACTUAL SONG. (But it was the only embed able version I could find.)
Rushing and racing
and running in circles
Moving so fast, I'm forgetting my purpose
Blur of the traffic is sending me spinning
Getting nowhere
My head and my heart are colliding, chaotic
Pace of the world
I just wish I could stop it
Try to appear like I've got it together
I'm falling apart
Save me
Somebody take my hand, and lead me
Slow me down
Don't let love pass me by
Just show me how
'Cause I'm ready to fall
Slow me down
Don't let me live a lie
Before my life flys by
I need you to slow me down
Sometimes I fear that I might dissapear
In the blur of fast forward I faulter again
Forgetting to breathe, I need to sleep
I'm getting nowhere
All that I've missed I see in the reflection
Passed me while I wasn't paying attention
Tired of rushing, racing and running
I'm falling apart
Tell me
Oh won't you take my hand and lead me
Slow me down
Don't let love pass me by
Just show me how
'Cause I'm ready to fall
Slow me down
Don't let me live a lie
Before my life flys by
I need you to slow me down
Just show me
I need you to slow me down
The noise of the world is getting me caught up
Chasing the clock and I wish I could stop it
Just need to breathe, somebody please
Slow me down
Thank you to my friends and family who've been there with me through the psycho-ness of this week. I couldn't have attempted to be able to finish it (the week) without you and your warm thoughts and words. :) Thank you so much. I love you all. ;)
I'm SO glad this week is almost over...
SKIP TO THE 35 SEC MARK B/C THE BEGINNING IS JUST ADVERTISING JUNK AND NOT THE ACTUAL SONG. (But it was the only embed able version I could find.)
Rushing and racing
and running in circles
Moving so fast, I'm forgetting my purpose
Blur of the traffic is sending me spinning
Getting nowhere
My head and my heart are colliding, chaotic
Pace of the world
I just wish I could stop it
Try to appear like I've got it together
I'm falling apart
Save me
Somebody take my hand, and lead me
Slow me down
Don't let love pass me by
Just show me how
'Cause I'm ready to fall
Slow me down
Don't let me live a lie
Before my life flys by
I need you to slow me down
Sometimes I fear that I might dissapear
In the blur of fast forward I faulter again
Forgetting to breathe, I need to sleep
I'm getting nowhere
All that I've missed I see in the reflection
Passed me while I wasn't paying attention
Tired of rushing, racing and running
I'm falling apart
Tell me
Oh won't you take my hand and lead me
Slow me down
Don't let love pass me by
Just show me how
'Cause I'm ready to fall
Slow me down
Don't let me live a lie
Before my life flys by
I need you to slow me down
Just show me
I need you to slow me down
The noise of the world is getting me caught up
Chasing the clock and I wish I could stop it
Just need to breathe, somebody please
Slow me down
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Completely
I was asked to sing a special at church for Sunday morning service. I'm going to sing a song called completely by Ana Laura. It's about surrendering and giving everything up to God, which I've really been struggling with this year, especially when it comes to trying to conceive. So here's the song for you all to hear it. Ana Laura is performing it.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Yoga
So I've been taking Yoga classes now since mid-January and LOVE THEM!!!! It's a great way for me to go and destress and get all bendy. :) I always feel great when I'm done and I never want the class to end. My husband, on the other hand, does not share in my Yoga enthusiasm. Don't get me wrong, he's completely okay with me going but he has no desire to go and participate with me. Maybe he's not bendy enough? I don't know. :)
I don't always have the same teacher for every class and each teacher does different poses. Sometimes when I'm in class, I'm reminded of a stand-up act by Brian Regan. It's called Yoga Made Impossible. Very funny. Thought you might all enjoy it. :)
I don't always have the same teacher for every class and each teacher does different poses. Sometimes when I'm in class, I'm reminded of a stand-up act by Brian Regan. It's called Yoga Made Impossible. Very funny. Thought you might all enjoy it. :)
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Tonight
To my One and Only... I love you so much. I'm so proud of you and all you do for this family. Thank you for being my anchor to hold onto when the winds of life try to blow me away.
I'll be thinking about you (and singing this song in my head) while I'm at work tonight. :) xoxo
~b
BE STILL by Schuyler Fisk
Hold my hand
My fingers are cold.
Don't say a word
Just hold me close.
Steetlight in through the curtains
Are just right,
So don't you move.
Tonight, tonight
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
I can't wait.
I think you wanna kiss me, and I
Won't look. Only listen.
The earth moves
And the ocean sways
Let the moon run out
If we could just stay
Tonight, tonight
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
'Cause even if I'm scared to fall
I'd rather love than loose it all
Then to never be loved..
I'd rather be loved.
Tonight, tonight
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still (Don't You move)
Be Still (Don't You Move)
Be Still
Be Still
I'll be thinking about you (and singing this song in my head) while I'm at work tonight. :) xoxo
~b
BE STILL by Schuyler Fisk
Hold my hand
My fingers are cold.
Don't say a word
Just hold me close.
Steetlight in through the curtains
Are just right,
So don't you move.
Tonight, tonight
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
I can't wait.
I think you wanna kiss me, and I
Won't look. Only listen.
The earth moves
And the ocean sways
Let the moon run out
If we could just stay
Tonight, tonight
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
'Cause even if I'm scared to fall
I'd rather love than loose it all
Then to never be loved..
I'd rather be loved.
Tonight, tonight
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still
Be Still (Don't You move)
Be Still (Don't You Move)
Be Still
Be Still
Monday, February 9, 2009
Cuore Assente
I love this song. If you, the reader, could actually read and understand the Italian lyrics and not listen to the song, you might ask: "Why in the world do you like this song? It's about a lost love." Well because I do. :) Yes it's about lost love/absent heart. But the song is not a sad sounding, depressed song. It is peppy and has a beat. It's a lost love but she's not going to cry and be sad about it, she's moved on. I have my one and only love right here and I am so blessed to be married to him. :)
BUT...
Back in the day, there were others and I experienced many a broken heart. So if you're still looking for your one and only this Valentine's Day week, take heart. Someday you will find each other and you will be stronger for dealing with all the frogs you met up with along the way.
AND...
Don't let the flirts, acting romantics, and players that you meet (and fall for) along the way get you down. If they can't respect you and appreciate you for who you are, drop em. It will be okay.
They are not the only fish in the sea. You can do much better than that. Because a guy like that doesn't deserve you.
When you get down, just sing the La La song. :)
Cuore Assente (The La La Song)
by Giusy Ferreri
E cerco le parole
Tra milioni di poesie ma
Trovo solamente il tuo cuore assente,
la la la.
Cè stato un tempo in cui ti dedicai
Tutta una vita intera di passione e di bugie
Che custodisco in queste lettere
Che leggerai attento senza mai comprendere
Chi non si pente ha un cuore assente
La la la.
Forse ho corso troppo forte in questa via
E sarò ingenua ma non credo sarà colpa mia
Se ho faticato lungo la salita
Cercando che la vita mi restasse amica e
Guardo il presente dal cuore assente
La la la..
Tu sei forte
Io debole
Sei distante
Sto con te
Non respiro
Tu non credi
Chiudo gli occhi e tu non vedi
Come sto e dove andrò
Lo sai tu
ma io no
Mentre forte mi nascondo
Fra la gente e il cuore assente
Tu vuoi capire queste parole
amore che muore
la la la..
Come sto e dove andrò
Lo sai tu
ma io no
Mentre forte mi nascondo
Fra la gente e il cuore assente
Tu vuoi capire queste parole
amore che muore
BUT...
Back in the day, there were others and I experienced many a broken heart. So if you're still looking for your one and only this Valentine's Day week, take heart. Someday you will find each other and you will be stronger for dealing with all the frogs you met up with along the way.
AND...
Don't let the flirts, acting romantics, and players that you meet (and fall for) along the way get you down. If they can't respect you and appreciate you for who you are, drop em. It will be okay.
They are not the only fish in the sea. You can do much better than that. Because a guy like that doesn't deserve you.
When you get down, just sing the La La song. :)
Cuore Assente (The La La Song)
by Giusy Ferreri
E cerco le parole
Tra milioni di poesie ma
Trovo solamente il tuo cuore assente,
la la la.
Cè stato un tempo in cui ti dedicai
Tutta una vita intera di passione e di bugie
Che custodisco in queste lettere
Che leggerai attento senza mai comprendere
Chi non si pente ha un cuore assente
La la la.
Forse ho corso troppo forte in questa via
E sarò ingenua ma non credo sarà colpa mia
Se ho faticato lungo la salita
Cercando che la vita mi restasse amica e
Guardo il presente dal cuore assente
La la la..
Tu sei forte
Io debole
Sei distante
Sto con te
Non respiro
Tu non credi
Chiudo gli occhi e tu non vedi
Come sto e dove andrò
Lo sai tu
ma io no
Mentre forte mi nascondo
Fra la gente e il cuore assente
Tu vuoi capire queste parole
amore che muore
la la la..
Come sto e dove andrò
Lo sai tu
ma io no
Mentre forte mi nascondo
Fra la gente e il cuore assente
Tu vuoi capire queste parole
amore che muore
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Who now will sing me lullabies?
I can't keep doing this. It hurts too much and I don't think I can handle anymore disappointment. It only leads to heart break. :(
Who Will Sing Me Lullabies? by Kate Rusby
Lay me down gently, lay me down low,
I fear I am broken and won't mend, I know.
One thing I ask when the stars light the skies,
Who now will sing me lullabies,
Oh who now will sing me lullabies.
In this big world I'm lonely, for I am but small,
Oh angels in heaven, don't you care for me at all?
You heard my heart breaking for it rang through the skies,
So why don't you sing me lullabies,
Oh why don't you sing me lullabies.
I lay here; I'm weeping for the stars they have come,
I lay here not sleeping; now the long night has begun.
The man in the moon, oh he can't help but cry,
For there's no one to sing me lullabies,
Oh there's no one to sing me lullabies.
So lay me down gently, oh lay me down low,
I fear I am broken and won't mend, I know .
One thing I ask when the stars light the skies,
Who now will sing me lullabies,
Oh who now will sing me lullabies.
Who will sing me to sleep
Who will sing me to sleep
Who will sing me to sleep
Who will sing me to sleep
Who Will Sing Me Lullabies? by Kate Rusby
Lay me down gently, lay me down low,
I fear I am broken and won't mend, I know.
One thing I ask when the stars light the skies,
Who now will sing me lullabies,
Oh who now will sing me lullabies.
In this big world I'm lonely, for I am but small,
Oh angels in heaven, don't you care for me at all?
You heard my heart breaking for it rang through the skies,
So why don't you sing me lullabies,
Oh why don't you sing me lullabies.
I lay here; I'm weeping for the stars they have come,
I lay here not sleeping; now the long night has begun.
The man in the moon, oh he can't help but cry,
For there's no one to sing me lullabies,
Oh there's no one to sing me lullabies.
So lay me down gently, oh lay me down low,
I fear I am broken and won't mend, I know .
One thing I ask when the stars light the skies,
Who now will sing me lullabies,
Oh who now will sing me lullabies.
Who will sing me to sleep
Who will sing me to sleep
Who will sing me to sleep
Who will sing me to sleep
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Where do I begin?
Hi all. Sorry I raised so much concern from my last post. I'm doing a bit better. Much of that last post stemmed from over exhaustion and stress. I've been going to sleep really early since then and trying to maintain a clear mind and positive attitude. My husband has been wonderful and supportive through all this. I'm very blessed to have a man like him.
Today I went to my yoga class which helped IMMENSELY. They played music by Hotel Costes during yoga. It's a mix of all different songs and kinds of music but with more of an electronic dance club feel. It was surprisingly very relaxing and nice. So I'm going to add one here for you all. It's called "Where do I begin" originally sung by Shirly Bassey but remixed for the Hotel Costes Vol 3 album.
Please keep me in your prayers. Thank you.
Today I went to my yoga class which helped IMMENSELY. They played music by Hotel Costes during yoga. It's a mix of all different songs and kinds of music but with more of an electronic dance club feel. It was surprisingly very relaxing and nice. So I'm going to add one here for you all. It's called "Where do I begin" originally sung by Shirly Bassey but remixed for the Hotel Costes Vol 3 album.
Please keep me in your prayers. Thank you.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Broken
I'm tired, I need to go to bed. But... I'm hurting so much right now. My heart is bleeding and I feel broken. Please, Please Lord. Why? Why? This isn't me and this isn't where I want to be. I want me back. Please, Please! When will this happen? I don't know if I can take any more. I hurt. I feel like I've been broken into a million pieces and all those pieces have been scattered everywhere. Right now it feels like they'll never be able to be put back together again. There's nothing more I can say now. You know how I'm feeling Lord and why. Please, Please, PLEASE Lord. Please. Why did you make me feel this way only to make me have to wait more? I'm so broken right now even I hardly recognize myself. please...
SURRENDER by Barlow Girl
My hands hold safely to my dreams
Clutching tightly not one has fallen.
So many years I’ve shaped each one
Reflecting my heart, showing who I am.
Now you’re asking me to show
What I’m holding Oh so tightly.
Can’t open my hand; can’t let go
Does it matter?
Should I show you?
Can’t you let me go?
Surrender, surrender
You whisper gently
You say I will be free
I know but can’t you see
My dreams are me, My dreams are me
Say you have a plan for me
And that you want the best for my life.
Told me the world has yet to see
What you can do with one
That’s committed to your call.
I know of course what I should do
That I can’t hold these dreams forever.
But if I give them now to you
Will you take them
Away forever? Or can I dream again?
Surrender, surrender
You whisper gently
You say I will be free
I know but can’t you see
My dreams are me, My dreams are me
SURRENDER by Barlow Girl
My hands hold safely to my dreams
Clutching tightly not one has fallen.
So many years I’ve shaped each one
Reflecting my heart, showing who I am.
Now you’re asking me to show
What I’m holding Oh so tightly.
Can’t open my hand; can’t let go
Does it matter?
Should I show you?
Can’t you let me go?
Surrender, surrender
You whisper gently
You say I will be free
I know but can’t you see
My dreams are me, My dreams are me
Say you have a plan for me
And that you want the best for my life.
Told me the world has yet to see
What you can do with one
That’s committed to your call.
I know of course what I should do
That I can’t hold these dreams forever.
But if I give them now to you
Will you take them
Away forever? Or can I dream again?
Surrender, surrender
You whisper gently
You say I will be free
I know but can’t you see
My dreams are me, My dreams are me
Falling
Oy... Long weekend and I'm exhausted. Nothing seems to be right and I'm just bleh... I can't think logically at all. All I want to do is climb in my bed and sleep away today and maybe tomorrow. :( Right now? Yup. I feel like I'm falling...
FALLING
by Kate Rusby
Ya hear me shout when no one's about,
You find me where I can't be seen.
I feel the air flowing for life's in full swing,
So tell me why I cannot breathe.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
Time moves on and time won't be long,
In time I will fear not the day.
I'm endlessly knowing that you'll never know
What I might want you to say.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
My back it aches, my body it breaks;
To grow my own wings I have tried.
And painless I came no aim must remain,
Alone and adrift on the tide
But here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
And here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone
FALLING
by Kate Rusby
Ya hear me shout when no one's about,
You find me where I can't be seen.
I feel the air flowing for life's in full swing,
So tell me why I cannot breathe.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
Time moves on and time won't be long,
In time I will fear not the day.
I'm endlessly knowing that you'll never know
What I might want you to say.
And here I am falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
My back it aches, my body it breaks;
To grow my own wings I have tried.
And painless I came no aim must remain,
Alone and adrift on the tide
But here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone.
And here I'm still falling,
Oh why am I falling.
Take me to where I belong.
I'm standing here falling,
Before you falling.
If it weren't for your wings
If it weren't for your wings I'd be gone
Saturday, January 31, 2009
In love with my best friend
I know I've said this before but, I LOVE Sirius's Coffee Shop Acoustic radio station. I just heard a beautiful perfect song. It's called Lucky and sung by Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat.
I'm very lucky I'm in love with my best friend, and everyday I love him a little more than the day before. :)
xoxo
~b
I'm very lucky I'm in love with my best friend, and everyday I love him a little more than the day before. :)
xoxo
~b
Friday, January 30, 2009
Morning Lullabies
So I woke up this morning happily content and all curled up next to my honey. I didn't want to get out of bed. I just wanted to lay there all morning with him, watching him sleep. But then the alarm went off again and rudely reminded me that I had to get ready for work. So I left him there, sleeping, on his own.
I'm tired. I wish I was back in bed right now with him.
I love you and I can't wait to spend this weekend with you, my love, my best friend, my husband.
xoxo
~b
Morning Lullabies by Ingrid Michaelson
yesterday
i woke up
with your head on my arm
my hand was numb
circulation gone
but i dared not move
the pretty sleeping one
the sun had painted
patterns on your face
as you breathe sunday air
rode on to my open arms
i became your pillow
you let me smooth your hair
i will sing you morning lullabies
you are beautiful, and peaceful this way
i know you have to close your eyes
on everyone, let me help you,
ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabies
let me lie in the curve
of your body tonight
and i will hear you
tumble into sleep
i will watch you heal
i will watch you heal with me
i will sing you morning lullabies
you are beautiful, and peaceful this way
i know you have to close your eyes on everyone
let me help you, ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabies
i know you have to close your eyes on everyone
let me help you
ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabye..bye baby
close your eyes
and i will sing you
morning lullabies
I'm tired. I wish I was back in bed right now with him.
I love you and I can't wait to spend this weekend with you, my love, my best friend, my husband.
xoxo
~b
Morning Lullabies by Ingrid Michaelson
yesterday
i woke up
with your head on my arm
my hand was numb
circulation gone
but i dared not move
the pretty sleeping one
the sun had painted
patterns on your face
as you breathe sunday air
rode on to my open arms
i became your pillow
you let me smooth your hair
i will sing you morning lullabies
you are beautiful, and peaceful this way
i know you have to close your eyes
on everyone, let me help you,
ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabies
let me lie in the curve
of your body tonight
and i will hear you
tumble into sleep
i will watch you heal
i will watch you heal with me
i will sing you morning lullabies
you are beautiful, and peaceful this way
i know you have to close your eyes on everyone
let me help you, ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabies
i know you have to close your eyes on everyone
let me help you
ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabye..bye baby
close your eyes
and i will sing you
morning lullabies
Thursday, January 29, 2009
25 Random Things
Hi all! So I was tagged on my facebook page to write a note containing 25 random things about myself. It was hard but fun and I thought you all in blog world might want to read some of it someday when you get bored and you have nothing else to do. (It is pretty long.) So here you go. If you decide to do this too email or tag me so I can read it. :)
Rules:
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
(To do this, go to "notes" under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)
1. English was not my first language. Although both my parents were born and raised in America, my first language was Italian. My parents and I moved to Italy when I was 11 months old and we lived there for about 4 ½ years. While my parents were away doing mission work and also attending Italian language school, I would spend the day with my babysitter and her family. They spoke mostly Italian and very little English. So I grew up hearing Italian and speaking Italian more than English. Since moving back to the US I’ve forgotten most of my Italian b/c I’m surrounded by English, but I hope to be fluent in it again someday.
2. I can pee standing up. (Not all toilets in Italy were like the standard toilets we have here in the US 20+ years ago when I lived there. Some places just had a porcelain hole in the ground with ridges in the porcelain on the sides of the hole where you were supposed to put your feet. During my potty training years it was not uncommon for me to be out and about in town and have to use one of those.)
3. I used to want to be a comedian when I was a kid, but the best joke I could come up with was the “Knock Knock, Boo Who? joke”.
4. One of my favorite memories as a kid was when my sisters and I would get our baths on Saturday or Sunday evening and then sit on the floor eating pb&j sandwiches while our parents brushed out our hair. During then the tv was on and we would watch: The Lawrence Welk show, Hee Haw, or America’s Funniest Home Videos. True family bonding moments. :D
5. My husband once said to me: “Bethany, I love you, but… Sometimes I think that your heart gets so big it cuts off the circulation to your brain.” And I didn’t get mad at him. Instead, I laughed because it’s true. I’ve always been an overly empathetic person. That’s one reason I don’t like altar calls at church b/c they always make me cry when I see people go up.
6. My quiet husband was the one who first introduced himself to me when I first moved to NE Ohio, and then I avoided him for 3 months. Whenever I complained to my best friend in NW Ohio that I couldn’t find a good, close friend here like her, his name kept popping up in my head and wouldn’t go away. When I did finally talk to him, I found out we had a lot in common and 6 years later we were married.
7. In 2008 I realized that there is a lot of random stuff that take for granted/consider normal, while the majority of my friends haven’t ever seen or experienced said random stuff. I went to Maine to visit my family this summer and many people in southern Maine (especially in the mountains) have old stone fences (just flat stone on top of each other no mortar or cement to hold them together) surrounding their property and little areas in their property. (Most of them are family burial plots, but the empty fenced in areas were created for people to put random wondering livestock in until the farmer realized the livestock was missing and came to find them.)
8. I found out a few years ago that I’m not of mostly English decent like I was told growing up. Actually, the head matriarch and patriarch of my father’s family were from Scotland and Ireland. There is some English mixed in further down the family tree but mostly Scottish and Irish. And to think, all these years I was slightly jealous of people with Irish decent on St. Patrick’s day for nothing. I had Irish in me the whole time.
9. I’m a coffee snob. I only like espresso, cappuccino, any mocha, and other things one would make on their Rancillo or find in a Starbucks. I don’t like regular coffee. Sorry… It’s ucky.
10. I’m learning to sew and I sometimes knit. (Little by little I’m getting closer and closer to being more domestimicated. Yes I spelt it wrong on purpose.)
11. When I was a kid I never understood why my mom hated and was so scared of mice. Now that I own my own old home I understand.
12. I have Spina Bifida Occulta. Because of this and a sketchy family history of Spina Bifida, I have to take 10 times the daily recommended dosage of Folic acid to help prevent neural tube birth defects should I get pregnant. (For those curious: The normal recommended amount of folic acid a woman should have is 400 micrograms. I take 4 milligrams.)
13. I once had a crush on a guy friend of mine for almost 4 years when I was in jr.high and high school. I never told him until a friend of mine spilled the beans to him. It never worked out though. He had a girlfriend at the time and a year later my dad got a job at another church and my family and I had to move to the other side of the state.
14. I have a “J-lo butt” and because of it, I’ve been hit on at: a funeral home (true story), on a construction site at my place of employment, walking outside (A guy actually followed me in his truck while I was walking back to my car, in broad daylight, saying all kinds of things I won’t repeat. Scary!), in a bank parking lot, at Burger King, on my way into the apartment I lived at AND once it was so bad I had a stalker (very true story). Creeps me out!
15. I’m a random person but I’m having a hard time coming up with 25 random things.
16. I would like to have a bigger house and hate being reminded of how small it is every time people are over (Not that they say anything, but when it’s crowded, it’s very obvious how small it is).
17. When we have children, I want to be a stay at home mom (at least until they’re in school).
18. I would like to get Suzy (our newf mix) a friend or two. (She seems lonely.) If I could, I would adopt an Irish Wolfhound and a Great Dane to add to our family. BUT, one of us would have to be home more to be able to give them the training and attention they’d need AND our house right now is too small to house 2 adults and 3 large breed dogs.
19. I love Jane Austen’s works and the Colin Firth/BBC version of Pride and Prejudice. I hated the Keira Knightley Pride and Prejudice move version.
20. The only game system I had growing up was an Atari and that was because it was given to my family. I’ve been very slow in developing any “gamer skills” and they’re still a long way off. (It’s a long road but I’m actually finally getting past level one of the classic Mario game on the Nintendo DS.)
21. Speaking of games… I’m married to the 1992 Ashtabula Tetris Champion. :D
22. I want to go to Hawaii, especially Maui. But if I go, I want to avoid the touristy places like the plague. Instead I want to spend time getting to know the people that live there and hang out with the locals. Then I will have truly felt like I’ve experienced the real Hawaii.
23. I love my dog Suzy. Sometimes we fall asleep on the couch together. It’s like sleeping with one of those giant oversized stuffed animals your boyfriend wins for you at the fair. Only, this one is alive.
24. There are days where my brain is in overload and I just want to run away from everything and almost everyone. When this happens, I like to picture myself somewhere on a remote fishermen’s island off the coast of Nova Scotia or Ireland. I’m sitting on a rocking chair, on my porch at my big New England style victorian/colonial home, wrapped up in a grey fishermen’s style sweater and watching the grey sky and waves crash over the rocky break wall.
25. I have a blog called Song Mistress. My posts consist of songs and thoughts and life. If you’re looking for some music ideas go to http://betaniagioia.blogspot.com A lot of it is folksy but there is the occasional rock and pop song on there too.
Rules:
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
(To do this, go to "notes" under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)
1. English was not my first language. Although both my parents were born and raised in America, my first language was Italian. My parents and I moved to Italy when I was 11 months old and we lived there for about 4 ½ years. While my parents were away doing mission work and also attending Italian language school, I would spend the day with my babysitter and her family. They spoke mostly Italian and very little English. So I grew up hearing Italian and speaking Italian more than English. Since moving back to the US I’ve forgotten most of my Italian b/c I’m surrounded by English, but I hope to be fluent in it again someday.
2. I can pee standing up. (Not all toilets in Italy were like the standard toilets we have here in the US 20+ years ago when I lived there. Some places just had a porcelain hole in the ground with ridges in the porcelain on the sides of the hole where you were supposed to put your feet. During my potty training years it was not uncommon for me to be out and about in town and have to use one of those.)
3. I used to want to be a comedian when I was a kid, but the best joke I could come up with was the “Knock Knock, Boo Who? joke”.
4. One of my favorite memories as a kid was when my sisters and I would get our baths on Saturday or Sunday evening and then sit on the floor eating pb&j sandwiches while our parents brushed out our hair. During then the tv was on and we would watch: The Lawrence Welk show, Hee Haw, or America’s Funniest Home Videos. True family bonding moments. :D
5. My husband once said to me: “Bethany, I love you, but… Sometimes I think that your heart gets so big it cuts off the circulation to your brain.” And I didn’t get mad at him. Instead, I laughed because it’s true. I’ve always been an overly empathetic person. That’s one reason I don’t like altar calls at church b/c they always make me cry when I see people go up.
6. My quiet husband was the one who first introduced himself to me when I first moved to NE Ohio, and then I avoided him for 3 months. Whenever I complained to my best friend in NW Ohio that I couldn’t find a good, close friend here like her, his name kept popping up in my head and wouldn’t go away. When I did finally talk to him, I found out we had a lot in common and 6 years later we were married.
7. In 2008 I realized that there is a lot of random stuff that take for granted/consider normal, while the majority of my friends haven’t ever seen or experienced said random stuff. I went to Maine to visit my family this summer and many people in southern Maine (especially in the mountains) have old stone fences (just flat stone on top of each other no mortar or cement to hold them together) surrounding their property and little areas in their property. (Most of them are family burial plots, but the empty fenced in areas were created for people to put random wondering livestock in until the farmer realized the livestock was missing and came to find them.)
8. I found out a few years ago that I’m not of mostly English decent like I was told growing up. Actually, the head matriarch and patriarch of my father’s family were from Scotland and Ireland. There is some English mixed in further down the family tree but mostly Scottish and Irish. And to think, all these years I was slightly jealous of people with Irish decent on St. Patrick’s day for nothing. I had Irish in me the whole time.
9. I’m a coffee snob. I only like espresso, cappuccino, any mocha, and other things one would make on their Rancillo or find in a Starbucks. I don’t like regular coffee. Sorry… It’s ucky.
10. I’m learning to sew and I sometimes knit. (Little by little I’m getting closer and closer to being more domestimicated. Yes I spelt it wrong on purpose.)
11. When I was a kid I never understood why my mom hated and was so scared of mice. Now that I own my own old home I understand.
12. I have Spina Bifida Occulta. Because of this and a sketchy family history of Spina Bifida, I have to take 10 times the daily recommended dosage of Folic acid to help prevent neural tube birth defects should I get pregnant. (For those curious: The normal recommended amount of folic acid a woman should have is 400 micrograms. I take 4 milligrams.)
13. I once had a crush on a guy friend of mine for almost 4 years when I was in jr.high and high school. I never told him until a friend of mine spilled the beans to him. It never worked out though. He had a girlfriend at the time and a year later my dad got a job at another church and my family and I had to move to the other side of the state.
14. I have a “J-lo butt” and because of it, I’ve been hit on at: a funeral home (true story), on a construction site at my place of employment, walking outside (A guy actually followed me in his truck while I was walking back to my car, in broad daylight, saying all kinds of things I won’t repeat. Scary!), in a bank parking lot, at Burger King, on my way into the apartment I lived at AND once it was so bad I had a stalker (very true story). Creeps me out!
15. I’m a random person but I’m having a hard time coming up with 25 random things.
16. I would like to have a bigger house and hate being reminded of how small it is every time people are over (Not that they say anything, but when it’s crowded, it’s very obvious how small it is).
17. When we have children, I want to be a stay at home mom (at least until they’re in school).
18. I would like to get Suzy (our newf mix) a friend or two. (She seems lonely.) If I could, I would adopt an Irish Wolfhound and a Great Dane to add to our family. BUT, one of us would have to be home more to be able to give them the training and attention they’d need AND our house right now is too small to house 2 adults and 3 large breed dogs.
19. I love Jane Austen’s works and the Colin Firth/BBC version of Pride and Prejudice. I hated the Keira Knightley Pride and Prejudice move version.
20. The only game system I had growing up was an Atari and that was because it was given to my family. I’ve been very slow in developing any “gamer skills” and they’re still a long way off. (It’s a long road but I’m actually finally getting past level one of the classic Mario game on the Nintendo DS.)
21. Speaking of games… I’m married to the 1992 Ashtabula Tetris Champion. :D
22. I want to go to Hawaii, especially Maui. But if I go, I want to avoid the touristy places like the plague. Instead I want to spend time getting to know the people that live there and hang out with the locals. Then I will have truly felt like I’ve experienced the real Hawaii.
23. I love my dog Suzy. Sometimes we fall asleep on the couch together. It’s like sleeping with one of those giant oversized stuffed animals your boyfriend wins for you at the fair. Only, this one is alive.
24. There are days where my brain is in overload and I just want to run away from everything and almost everyone. When this happens, I like to picture myself somewhere on a remote fishermen’s island off the coast of Nova Scotia or Ireland. I’m sitting on a rocking chair, on my porch at my big New England style victorian/colonial home, wrapped up in a grey fishermen’s style sweater and watching the grey sky and waves crash over the rocky break wall.
25. I have a blog called Song Mistress. My posts consist of songs and thoughts and life. If you’re looking for some music ideas go to http://betaniagioia.blogspot.com A lot of it is folksy but there is the occasional rock and pop song on there too.
For you
A Bird's Song
by Ingrid Michaelson
When I would play my song
You used to sing along.
I always seem to forget
How fragile are the very strong.
I'm sorry I can't steal you
I'm sorry I can't stay
So I put band-aids on your knees
And watch you fly away
I'm sending you away tonight
I'll put you on a bird's strong wing
I'm saving you the best way I know how
I hope again one day to hear you sing
You know we're not so far away
Get on a boat, get on a train
And if you ever think you're drowning
I'll try to slow the rain
In two years or so
Drop me a line
Write me a letter
I hope to find you're doing better, better than today, better everyday
I'm sending you away tonight
I'll put you on a bird's strong wing
I'm saving you the best way I know how
I hope again one day to hear you sing
I'm saving you the only way that I know how
I hope again one day to hear you sing
I hope again one day to see you bring your smile back around again
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Dante's Prayer
So I was looking at the obits section in the local paper and saw that a recent graduate from the university I work at passed away. I was shocked.
She was a very kind and sweet girl and I had gotten to know her a little bit b/c she was in the library often getting articles for her class, doing research, or studying. My thoughts and prayers go out to her family. She will be greatly missed.
Two weeks earlier to the day, the dean of the university I work at lost her son-in-law to leukemia. He was a young, healthy football coach for one of the local high schools when he was diagnosed with leukemia. He fought a long, courageous battle and passed away on the 10th surrounded by his family and friends.
So why this sad news and death talk on a blog about music? Well...
While I was driving to work and listening to my ipod this morning, Dante's Prayer came on by Loreena McKennitt. Although the song was inspired by Dante's Divine Comedy, the lyrics always sounded to me as though it was either a song sung to (or sung by) someone who had left or passed away.
And so, I would like to leave you with Dante's Prayer by Loreena McKennitt, in memory of Cary, John and all other loved ones who have gone on before us. My thoughts, prayers, and warm wishes go out to you all.
Dante's Prayer
Words and music by Loreena McKennitt
When the dark wood fell before me
And all the paths were overgrown
When the priests of pride say there is no other way
I tilled the sorrows of stone
I did not believe because I could not see
Though you came to me in the night
When the dawn seemed forever lost
You showed me your love in the light of the stars
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Then the mountain rose before me
By the deep well of desire
From the fountain of forgiveness
Beyond the ice and fire
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Though we share this humble path, alone
How fragile is the heart
Oh give these clay feet wings to fly
To touch the face of the stars
Breathe life into this feeble heart
Lift this mortal veil of fear
Take these crumbled hopes, etched with tears
We'll rise above these earthly cares
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Please remember me
She was a very kind and sweet girl and I had gotten to know her a little bit b/c she was in the library often getting articles for her class, doing research, or studying. My thoughts and prayers go out to her family. She will be greatly missed.
Two weeks earlier to the day, the dean of the university I work at lost her son-in-law to leukemia. He was a young, healthy football coach for one of the local high schools when he was diagnosed with leukemia. He fought a long, courageous battle and passed away on the 10th surrounded by his family and friends.
So why this sad news and death talk on a blog about music? Well...
While I was driving to work and listening to my ipod this morning, Dante's Prayer came on by Loreena McKennitt. Although the song was inspired by Dante's Divine Comedy, the lyrics always sounded to me as though it was either a song sung to (or sung by) someone who had left or passed away.
And so, I would like to leave you with Dante's Prayer by Loreena McKennitt, in memory of Cary, John and all other loved ones who have gone on before us. My thoughts, prayers, and warm wishes go out to you all.
Dante's Prayer
Words and music by Loreena McKennitt
When the dark wood fell before me
And all the paths were overgrown
When the priests of pride say there is no other way
I tilled the sorrows of stone
I did not believe because I could not see
Though you came to me in the night
When the dawn seemed forever lost
You showed me your love in the light of the stars
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Then the mountain rose before me
By the deep well of desire
From the fountain of forgiveness
Beyond the ice and fire
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Though we share this humble path, alone
How fragile is the heart
Oh give these clay feet wings to fly
To touch the face of the stars
Breathe life into this feeble heart
Lift this mortal veil of fear
Take these crumbled hopes, etched with tears
We'll rise above these earthly cares
Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Please remember me
Friday, January 23, 2009
I had a dream
This song needs no explanation really. Priscilla Ahn is singing my thoughts of the past, present, and future. Maybe this will help you to know me better. :)
I was a little girl alone in my little world who dreamed of a little home for me.
I played pretend between the trees, and fed my house guests bark and leaves, and laughed in my pretty bed of green.
I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest swing.
I had a dream.
Long walks in the dark through woods grown behind the park, I asked God who I'm supposed to be.
The stars smiled down on me, God answered in silent reverie. I said a prayer and fell asleep.
I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest tree.
I had a dream.
Now I'm old and feeling grey. I don't know what's left to say about this life I'm willing to leave.
I lived it full and I lived it well, there's many tales I've lived to tell. I'm ready now, I'm ready now, I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing.
I had a dream
I was a little girl alone in my little world who dreamed of a little home for me.
I played pretend between the trees, and fed my house guests bark and leaves, and laughed in my pretty bed of green.
I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest swing.
I had a dream.
Long walks in the dark through woods grown behind the park, I asked God who I'm supposed to be.
The stars smiled down on me, God answered in silent reverie. I said a prayer and fell asleep.
I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest tree.
I had a dream.
Now I'm old and feeling grey. I don't know what's left to say about this life I'm willing to leave.
I lived it full and I lived it well, there's many tales I've lived to tell. I'm ready now, I'm ready now, I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing.
I had a dream
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Sigh...
Ok so I'm not completely cold and heartless even if the previous post left you wondering that. :) I'm actually a hopeless romantic. Really I am, just ask my family. :) So today I was listening to music while I was at work and "A te" by Jovanotti popped up. (A beautiful Italian song.) I tried to find the lyrics for it and I did one better. I found the lyrics for it that someone had translated into english. And so, I give you "A te" by Jovanotti (The translated lyrics are below the video. I don't know how well the english translation was done so if the person got something wrong, let me know.)
To you, because you're unique in the world
The only reason
To go till the end
At every breath of mine,
When I look at you,
After a day full of words,
Without you saying anything to me,
Everything gets clear
To you, because you're the one that found me
At the corner, with my fists closed
With my back against the wall
Ready to defend myself
With my eyes facing the ground
I was standing in the line
With the disappointed people
You've picked me up
Like a cat
And you've taken me with you
To you I sing another song
Because I don't have anything else
Anything better to give to you
Of everything I do have
Take my time
And the magic
That with one jump
Makes us fly in the air
Like papules
To you, because you are
You simply are
The substance of my days
The substance of my days
To you, my great love
And my biggest love
To you, because you've taken my life
And you've done a lot more with it
To you, because you gave time some sense
Without measuring it
To you my great love
And my biggest love
To you
whom I have seen crying in my hand
So fragile that I could have killed you just by squeezing you a little stronger
And then I've seen you
Having the strength of an airplane
Taking your life in your hands
And draging it into a safe zone
To you, because you've teached me how to dream
And the art of the adventure
To you, because you believe in courage
But also in fear
To you, the best thing
That happened to me
To you, because you change all the days
But you always stay the same
To you, because you are
You simply are
The substance of my days
The substance of my dreams
To you, because you are
You truly are
The substance of my dreams
The substance of my days
To you, because you never like yourself
But you're wonderful
Nature's forces gather in you
You're a cliff, a plant, a hurricane
You're the horizon that welcomes me when I go away
To you, the only friend
That I can have
The only love I'd want to have
If you weren't with me.
To you, because you've made my life
So beautiful
that you can turn fatigue
Into an immense pleasure
To you, because you are my great love
And my biggest love
To you, because you've taken my life
And you've made so much more out of it
To you, because you've given time some sense
Without measuring it
To you, great love of mine
My biggest love
To you, because you are
You simply are
The substance of my days
The substance of my dreams
And to you, because you are
You simply are
My days' partner
The substance of my dreams
To you, because you're unique in the world
The only reason
To go till the end
At every breath of mine,
When I look at you,
After a day full of words,
Without you saying anything to me,
Everything gets clear
To you, because you're the one that found me
At the corner, with my fists closed
With my back against the wall
Ready to defend myself
With my eyes facing the ground
I was standing in the line
With the disappointed people
You've picked me up
Like a cat
And you've taken me with you
To you I sing another song
Because I don't have anything else
Anything better to give to you
Of everything I do have
Take my time
And the magic
That with one jump
Makes us fly in the air
Like papules
To you, because you are
You simply are
The substance of my days
The substance of my days
To you, my great love
And my biggest love
To you, because you've taken my life
And you've done a lot more with it
To you, because you gave time some sense
Without measuring it
To you my great love
And my biggest love
To you
whom I have seen crying in my hand
So fragile that I could have killed you just by squeezing you a little stronger
And then I've seen you
Having the strength of an airplane
Taking your life in your hands
And draging it into a safe zone
To you, because you've teached me how to dream
And the art of the adventure
To you, because you believe in courage
But also in fear
To you, the best thing
That happened to me
To you, because you change all the days
But you always stay the same
To you, because you are
You simply are
The substance of my days
The substance of my dreams
To you, because you are
You truly are
The substance of my dreams
The substance of my days
To you, because you never like yourself
But you're wonderful
Nature's forces gather in you
You're a cliff, a plant, a hurricane
You're the horizon that welcomes me when I go away
To you, the only friend
That I can have
The only love I'd want to have
If you weren't with me.
To you, because you've made my life
So beautiful
that you can turn fatigue
Into an immense pleasure
To you, because you are my great love
And my biggest love
To you, because you've taken my life
And you've made so much more out of it
To you, because you've given time some sense
Without measuring it
To you, great love of mine
My biggest love
To you, because you are
You simply are
The substance of my days
The substance of my dreams
And to you, because you are
You simply are
My days' partner
The substance of my dreams
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Is it wrong to love this song as much as I do?
So I took a break out of my crazy day and was listening to my YouTube favorites. I stumbled on this little gem and when I really listened to the words, I thought it was hilarious!!!!
The song isn't really very nice at all and it's very sarcastic. But I've found I like her sarcastic humor. Am I a bad person for liking this song so much? What do you think of it? Have you ever met someone you wish you could sing this song to? (video from youtube and lyrics from erin mccarley's site are below)
Let me know what you think! :D
~b
Blue Suitcase
(Erin McCarley, Jamie Kenney)
VERSE 1
Oh, Wise One
If you knew the answer,
Why’d you ask the question?
Oh Wise One -
If you’re such a someone,
Why do you give nothing for anyone?
PRE-CHORUS
You’ve wiggled your way into me time and again
You love to speak your mind.
So it’s fair to say, "i'm not open today to have my heart twisted up!"
CHORUS
Your blue suitcase is empty, hey what’s your wait?
Your blue suitcase is empty, hey what’s your wait?
VERSE 2
Oh Wise Man
How do you get high man?
You must be self-absorbing.
Oh Wise Man -
Save me from your high man.
I can't afford another of your stuck up drug.
PRE-CHORUS
My confidence says, “I am worth it today”.
So try and change its mind.
Kiss your sweet girl away.
You've found your fate,
Now you will know what lonely pays.
CHORUS
Your blue suitcase is empty hey what’s your wait?
Your blue suitcase is empty heywhat’s your wait?
BRIDGE
na na na na na na na....
OUTRO
Tell me how does if feel to be so high above the clouds?
Oh tell me how does it feel to be so high above the clouds?
Well tell me how will it feel when no cares that you're not around?
The song isn't really very nice at all and it's very sarcastic. But I've found I like her sarcastic humor. Am I a bad person for liking this song so much? What do you think of it? Have you ever met someone you wish you could sing this song to? (video from youtube and lyrics from erin mccarley's site are below)
Let me know what you think! :D
~b
Blue Suitcase
(Erin McCarley, Jamie Kenney)
VERSE 1
Oh, Wise One
If you knew the answer,
Why’d you ask the question?
Oh Wise One -
If you’re such a someone,
Why do you give nothing for anyone?
PRE-CHORUS
You’ve wiggled your way into me time and again
You love to speak your mind.
So it’s fair to say, "i'm not open today to have my heart twisted up!"
CHORUS
Your blue suitcase is empty, hey what’s your wait?
Your blue suitcase is empty, hey what’s your wait?
VERSE 2
Oh Wise Man
How do you get high man?
You must be self-absorbing.
Oh Wise Man -
Save me from your high man.
I can't afford another of your stuck up drug.
PRE-CHORUS
My confidence says, “I am worth it today”.
So try and change its mind.
Kiss your sweet girl away.
You've found your fate,
Now you will know what lonely pays.
CHORUS
Your blue suitcase is empty hey what’s your wait?
Your blue suitcase is empty heywhat’s your wait?
BRIDGE
na na na na na na na....
OUTRO
Tell me how does if feel to be so high above the clouds?
Oh tell me how does it feel to be so high above the clouds?
Well tell me how will it feel when no cares that you're not around?
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Random
Okay so I know this video is totally random, but thanks to my coworker (eh hmm... T) it's stuck in my head. So here you go all. Have you ever felt any disturbia?
Disturbia by Rihanna
Disturbia by Rihanna
Monday, January 12, 2009
Grrr....
So I turn 27 and now I get migraines?! I've never gotten them before but I'm pretty sure that's what I got last night and it hasn't gone away. Today hasn't been the best day in the world either (mostly b/c of the migraine). So I'm posting a song that I know and have owned for a while. (Again the video is not mine, it's one I found off YouTube.)
The angry song matches my mood right now and how my head feels.
But I can't listen to it right now unless I want an even worse headache.
Sad Exchange by Finger Eleven
(lyrics below)
Quietly thinking to myself
Sharing half our mind instead of none
The shakings just begun
The pleasantries are gone,
This sad exchange pleased neither one of us
So we finally gave up
Meanings tend to give out
The Time was gone to act out
this living torture, living torture
No talking When I want you to Listen
No talking cuz it's Living torture, Living torture
Don’t know why, don’t know why, we can’t stand aside
(I don't want your many faces
we don't see right)
If I had known back then
Whatever I know now
I'd think I’d have answers but I don’t know why
So we finally gave up
The Meanings tend to give out
The Time was gone to act out
But Here I am and I’m still living
No talking when I want you to listen
No Talking cos it's Living Torture, Living Torture
No talking when I want you to listen
Don't tell me what I’m trying to say to you
Both of us know
What it sounds like in my mind
Now both of us know
What it sounds It Sound like
Both of us know
What it sounds like in my mind
Now both of us know
Now both of us know
No talking when I want you to listen
No Talking cuz it's Living Torture, Living Torture
No talking when I want you to listen
Don't tell me what I’m trying to say to you
Quietly thinking to myself
This sad exchange pleased neither one of us
The angry song matches my mood right now and how my head feels.
But I can't listen to it right now unless I want an even worse headache.
Sad Exchange by Finger Eleven
(lyrics below)
Quietly thinking to myself
Sharing half our mind instead of none
The shakings just begun
The pleasantries are gone,
This sad exchange pleased neither one of us
So we finally gave up
Meanings tend to give out
The Time was gone to act out
this living torture, living torture
No talking When I want you to Listen
No talking cuz it's Living torture, Living torture
Don’t know why, don’t know why, we can’t stand aside
(I don't want your many faces
we don't see right)
If I had known back then
Whatever I know now
I'd think I’d have answers but I don’t know why
So we finally gave up
The Meanings tend to give out
The Time was gone to act out
But Here I am and I’m still living
No talking when I want you to listen
No Talking cos it's Living Torture, Living Torture
No talking when I want you to listen
Don't tell me what I’m trying to say to you
Both of us know
What it sounds like in my mind
Now both of us know
What it sounds It Sound like
Both of us know
What it sounds like in my mind
Now both of us know
Now both of us know
No talking when I want you to listen
No Talking cuz it's Living Torture, Living Torture
No talking when I want you to listen
Don't tell me what I’m trying to say to you
Quietly thinking to myself
This sad exchange pleased neither one of us
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Okay I'm listening
So today our church mixed things up a bit and showed a DVD in place of the service. It was VERY good and very insightful! The video is from the How Great is our God tour. Louie Giglio preached during that tour about the universe, life, and science. It was really good!
There was one quote that Louie quoted from Augustine. He says:
Men go abroad to wonder at the heights of mountains, the huge waves of the sea, the long courses of the rivers, the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motions of the stars, but they pass by themselves and don't even notice.
~Augustine
Wow. I'm still trying to wrap my head around everything I learned this morning. So definitely look him up and rent, buy, or watch on YouTube his service! :)
~b
How Great is Our God by Chris Tomlin
There was one quote that Louie quoted from Augustine. He says:
Men go abroad to wonder at the heights of mountains, the huge waves of the sea, the long courses of the rivers, the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motions of the stars, but they pass by themselves and don't even notice.
~Augustine
Wow. I'm still trying to wrap my head around everything I learned this morning. So definitely look him up and rent, buy, or watch on YouTube his service! :)
~b
How Great is Our God by Chris Tomlin
Slipping away....
Oy. It's late and I'm really getting tired... :) Off to bed I go. I am leaving you with a beautiful song I actually first heard on my friend's myspace page. It's called "River Flows in You" by Yiruma. When I did a youtube search I also found it's a favorite song among Twilight fans. So enjoy. :) I think it's a good song to go to sleep to.
~b
I just updated this and changed the video to replace it with this version of "River Flows in You". Youtube user shadowblade9876 wrote a beautiful poem to go along with the video and I couldn't pass it up. Thank you shadowblade.
Poem by shadowblade9876
When the lights of the stars shine down
Looking up from the earth of a distant land
Far from home in a small, old town
I reach up through the night to hold your hand
The journey has begun; Ive left to start anew
An unfamiliar ceiling hangs below the bluest of skies
Sitting on a mountain, a river flowing through you
I told you then Ill be home soon
Across the ocean, a memory eternally ours
A gateway to heaven sleeps beneath the stars
The tranquil noise, through wonders we roam
Thoughts drift back to our hearts, our home
My friend, Ill find you again one day
Across the world well see the stars drift away
As I turn to walk alone, to you I must tell
This is not goodbye, but farewell
The sea remains, the rain refrains
The sun is breathing, the light is weaving
The wind is sighing, the leaves are dying
The night is falling, the stars are calling
Exuberant nights surrounded by song
Firelights and silent nights carried us along
After the rain we returned once more
Turning to close the final door
A new door stands, waiting for me
I let go of your hand, I find its key
Ill be home soon, wait and see
The last tear falls, now Im free
I catch the falling rain on my hand
I stare across the sea on warming sand
Remembering your words as I depart
This is just the beginning, this is just the start
I know youll worry, I know youll cry
Im always there to wipe tears from your eyes
Without you, I stand alone
With you here, Im never far from home
The dragon sleeps upon my chest
Guarding me from rain, it rests
It follows me on the path Ive drawn
From the darkest night to the brightest dawn
Standing along the dreamers road
My eye catches yours from years ago
We meet again, we see the stars
My hand in yours, we escape once more
To where the words lie sleeping on distant shores
~b
I just updated this and changed the video to replace it with this version of "River Flows in You". Youtube user shadowblade9876 wrote a beautiful poem to go along with the video and I couldn't pass it up. Thank you shadowblade.
Poem by shadowblade9876
When the lights of the stars shine down
Looking up from the earth of a distant land
Far from home in a small, old town
I reach up through the night to hold your hand
The journey has begun; Ive left to start anew
An unfamiliar ceiling hangs below the bluest of skies
Sitting on a mountain, a river flowing through you
I told you then Ill be home soon
Across the ocean, a memory eternally ours
A gateway to heaven sleeps beneath the stars
The tranquil noise, through wonders we roam
Thoughts drift back to our hearts, our home
My friend, Ill find you again one day
Across the world well see the stars drift away
As I turn to walk alone, to you I must tell
This is not goodbye, but farewell
The sea remains, the rain refrains
The sun is breathing, the light is weaving
The wind is sighing, the leaves are dying
The night is falling, the stars are calling
Exuberant nights surrounded by song
Firelights and silent nights carried us along
After the rain we returned once more
Turning to close the final door
A new door stands, waiting for me
I let go of your hand, I find its key
Ill be home soon, wait and see
The last tear falls, now Im free
I catch the falling rain on my hand
I stare across the sea on warming sand
Remembering your words as I depart
This is just the beginning, this is just the start
I know youll worry, I know youll cry
Im always there to wipe tears from your eyes
Without you, I stand alone
With you here, Im never far from home
The dragon sleeps upon my chest
Guarding me from rain, it rests
It follows me on the path Ive drawn
From the darkest night to the brightest dawn
Standing along the dreamers road
My eye catches yours from years ago
We meet again, we see the stars
My hand in yours, we escape once more
To where the words lie sleeping on distant shores
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Reflection and special people
So now that the din of Nerdfest is dying down and I've finally gotten back to my normal sleep schedule, my brain has started to make more sense. I hope. :)
I don't know what all I've said or how I've come across these past 2 weeks but I hope I've made sense and not offended anyone.
Since my sanity seems to be returning today, I've been reflecting and reminiscing about people in my life. I feel very fortunate and blessed to be surrounded by all my friends and family. Each one holds a special place in my heart. Although this Christmas and New Years was VERY busy, it was very fun. Chris and I spent the holidays surrounded by family and some of our best friends.
I'm sure I've said it before in my blogs, but I really can't stop being so thankful and grateful for the group of friends and family God has given me. Especially ones that I don't get too see very often. When I do get to see them and spend time with them, it's like Christmas morning all over again.
Thank you for being such a great friend. I cherish and respect the time we spend together. You make me laugh when I'm feeling down, and offer a shoulder to cry on if I'm upset. You always seem to know the right words to say when I feel ugly or frumpy.
Our friendship has matured so much from when we first met. I'm thankful for the time we spent together over the holidays and will always remember them. I can only hope that I have been as good a friend to you as you have been to me.
I am praying for you and the goals and wishes you have. I hope that someday very soon they will come true. I also thank God for the time He has given me to spend with you. I cherish each moment.
So go, fly and be free. :) For no matter where you end up in life, you will always be in my heart, mind, and prayers. I hope that you find what you are looking for and that you will be happy. For when you find happiness, know that I and my heart rejoice with you.
Love,
b
In My Life sung by Bette Midler
Bella by Jovanotti
I don't know what all I've said or how I've come across these past 2 weeks but I hope I've made sense and not offended anyone.
Since my sanity seems to be returning today, I've been reflecting and reminiscing about people in my life. I feel very fortunate and blessed to be surrounded by all my friends and family. Each one holds a special place in my heart. Although this Christmas and New Years was VERY busy, it was very fun. Chris and I spent the holidays surrounded by family and some of our best friends.
I'm sure I've said it before in my blogs, but I really can't stop being so thankful and grateful for the group of friends and family God has given me. Especially ones that I don't get too see very often. When I do get to see them and spend time with them, it's like Christmas morning all over again.
Thank you for being such a great friend. I cherish and respect the time we spend together. You make me laugh when I'm feeling down, and offer a shoulder to cry on if I'm upset. You always seem to know the right words to say when I feel ugly or frumpy.
Our friendship has matured so much from when we first met. I'm thankful for the time we spent together over the holidays and will always remember them. I can only hope that I have been as good a friend to you as you have been to me.
I am praying for you and the goals and wishes you have. I hope that someday very soon they will come true. I also thank God for the time He has given me to spend with you. I cherish each moment.
So go, fly and be free. :) For no matter where you end up in life, you will always be in my heart, mind, and prayers. I hope that you find what you are looking for and that you will be happy. For when you find happiness, know that I and my heart rejoice with you.
Love,
b
In My Life sung by Bette Midler
Bella by Jovanotti
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
SHOES!!!!!! :D
So my birthday is tomorrow, and I had already received some birthday money, so I decided it was time to replace my ouchy ucky black shoes. I wear them to work a lot but the arch no longer supports correctly and the shoes are falling apart. So today I found... ;) a pair of GORGEOUS black boots and I LOVE them!!!! :D They are fun and sexy and look great w/my pants and my skirts. They are very similar to the ones Nancy Sinatra is wearing in the video below. They have the same pointy toes and also go to my knee (mine have a stiletto heel). Plus, they make me feel sexy. :)
I didn't used to be real big on shoes until I was in college and then I fell in love with them. Before I married my husband, I went through and threw away at least 15 pairs of shoes (no joke). We've been married almost 4 years and my shoe collection has more than doubled.
My husband says that he wants me to go through my shoes and get rid of them. The problem is, I wear them all!!! Not at the same time of course but they are all used and I love them too much to part with any of them.
So for now my shoes will stay. :) And perhaps at some point in my life (years from now) I will weed them out. ;) Love you sweetie!!!!
~b
I didn't used to be real big on shoes until I was in college and then I fell in love with them. Before I married my husband, I went through and threw away at least 15 pairs of shoes (no joke). We've been married almost 4 years and my shoe collection has more than doubled.
My husband says that he wants me to go through my shoes and get rid of them. The problem is, I wear them all!!! Not at the same time of course but they are all used and I love them too much to part with any of them.
So for now my shoes will stay. :) And perhaps at some point in my life (years from now) I will weed them out. ;) Love you sweetie!!!!
~b
Saturday, January 3, 2009
2008
I just got a chance to check out Neatorama and saw this. Thought it was funny and you all might enjoy it. :) Happy New Year everyone! :)
An oldie but a goodie
So this week I've been fully immersed in Nerdfest**. This year we've had about 12-15 people over here at any given time in the evening and at least 8-10 through out the day. This has not really given me a good block of time to blog. Too much going on and too much noise to blog. Lots of fun though!!!!
Anyways during Nerdfest we had a Lord of the Rings Marathon, which I enjoyed even more b/c 2 of the watchers hadn't ever seen the movie or read the books before. I've done both and really like how Peter Jackson wrote in the Arwen and Aragon love story. (In the books the relationship isn't really talked about until the index/encyclopedia section.)
Another fan of The Lord of the Rings trilogy made a fan video of Arwen and Aragon. This is the best one by far that I've seen and I'm going to post it on here. Check out the website at www.theargonath.cc
Here it is:
Broken by Amy Lee and Seether
Broken lyrics
SEETHER:
I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
SEETHER AND AMY LEE
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
AMY LEE
The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
AMY LEE AND SEETHER
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone
You're gone away
You don't feel me here anymore
**Nerdfest a party lasting 3 or more days in which all of our nerd friends bring their computers over to our house set up and play LAN games all day every day.**
Anyways during Nerdfest we had a Lord of the Rings Marathon, which I enjoyed even more b/c 2 of the watchers hadn't ever seen the movie or read the books before. I've done both and really like how Peter Jackson wrote in the Arwen and Aragon love story. (In the books the relationship isn't really talked about until the index/encyclopedia section.)
Another fan of The Lord of the Rings trilogy made a fan video of Arwen and Aragon. This is the best one by far that I've seen and I'm going to post it on here. Check out the website at www.theargonath.cc
Here it is:
Broken by Amy Lee and Seether
Broken lyrics
SEETHER:
I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
SEETHER AND AMY LEE
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
AMY LEE
The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
AMY LEE AND SEETHER
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone
You're gone away
You don't feel me here anymore
**Nerdfest a party lasting 3 or more days in which all of our nerd friends bring their computers over to our house set up and play LAN games all day every day.**
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
